Jul 11
2008
lou| Category: Uncategorized |
My God hear the cries of my heart as I hope and trust in you;
I hope that tomorrow will be brighter
I hope that sleep will come soon
I hope that my children will struggle less than me
I hope that I love you even a little as much as you love me
I hope that I do more good than bad
I hope that you forgive my deceitful lips
I hope that you forgive my weak, tired and mortal mind and body that is slow to learn, quick to judge and trusts not.
I hope that my words and actions don’t hurt those that I love
Help me to share the good news of Your love with those You send to me
Help me to love them unconditionally, seeing them as You see them
Help me to follow You and Your example in all that I do and take up my cross daily
I trust that You know the end from the beginning even when I cant see the road
I trust that You know what is best for me and my family
I trust that You never make mistakes and are always fair and just
Carry me Lord for my legs fail me and my eyes are closed, weary from squinting in the darkness of uncertainty and unbelief
Jul 11
2008
lou| Category: Uncategorized |
As a Speech Pathologist who works allot in resi care facilities part of my job entails swallowing assessments of patients who can no longer eat or drink safely.
On Wednesday I received an urgent call from one such place I go to every week.
A 78 year old lady who had been having swallowing difficulties for some time but was managing on thick fluids and puree solids was suddenly unable to swallow even her own saliva.
I walked into her room to find the entire family unit; husband, daughters and grandchildren all wide eyed and desperate for me to give them the news that it would be ok. On assessment I found this not to be the case.
Indeed the woman could not manage her own saliva and was spitting it into a hanky. The little bit that did make it down was clearly staying in her throat and making her cough and gag every 2 or so minutes.
I was faced with the ordeal of all alone (the RN having just abandoned me) telling this family, “Mary”, wife of 60 years, mother and grand mother could not eat and drink at all, knowing that in her notes was a direct order not to give her nutrition via artificial means. I asked her again if she wanted to go to hospital for artificial feeding. She shook her head. I explained that this meant she would simply fade away and die. She put her thumb up and smiled.
Looking around at the devastated faces with tears streaming down their cheeks. I felt like the grim reaper. The husband held her hand and whispered “where have all the years gone”
This family has stayed with me and their story effected me deeply. How quickly the years pass. How much of it have I wasted? Life here on earth is so fleeting.
